What's the Hold Up?

For those who actually check my blog from time to time, you might be wondering why I haven't been posting recently.

Don't worry, I still have many thoughts that are more radical than the ones already posted, I just want them to be well thought up and developed before I post them so that I can say something that sticks in everyone's mind. Above that, I am doing more research on the topics I have been thinking about (autodidactism remember?) so this may take some time every now and again but please believe I have a lot more coming.

And what's coming well be nothing short of a prelude of what I believe will come in our lifetime.

Feel free to look through my older posts to prepare for the upcoming ones.

Always remember, these are just my thoughts.

-Marcus J.

Self-Reflection on Memory Lane...

Ok, so today I was deep in my thoughts -arguably my feelings too lol- but I was literally getting a headache from thinking about things that are happening right now and felt like I was going insane. The main thing I was thinking about is how many things are about to change in my life in a matter of months, and by many I mean damn near everything.

Seeing how it is my fourth year in college, a lot of my colleagues will be graduating but due to my work/class schedule I will not. This makes me think of life, and everything that comes with it. How crazy it is that in a matter of seconds, minutes, hours, any amount of time your whole life can change permanently. Like that's actually crazy to think about, but I digress whatever.

So where did my thoughts lead me? To pictures and videos and posts and things of that sort to every social media outlet I've had since I was in middle school. From MySpace to FaceBook and all of that shit. Looking through pictures, thinking about the story that correlates with every one and the people who were in my life during those periods.

The joys and triumphs at every period and the people that were there with me to celebrate them, and also the hard times that I faced and the people who were there for me in my darkest moments.

And you want to know what I thought about? Where are these people now? All of these beautiful souls that helped me to get to where I am today, where are they? Of all the people that are in these pictures and these posts, shit even my top friends on MySpace (throwback right? haha) but where are they?

Then on top of that I began to think... Damn, do we not talk any more because of them or because of me? All of these "friends" that I had, why haven't I heard from any of them? My number's been the same since I was a freshman in high-school so it can't be me right? Wrong...

So from these thoughts I went into a period of self-reflection. Reflecting on all of the good times, all the bad times, all the people I've judged, all the people I wouldn't open up to, all the people I saw as just in my life for a season so I refused to put an effort into making a lasting relationship.

**Side note: one of my biggest fears is that I will end up alone in my final hour. Which of course is the way the world works, you're born alone and you die alone right? But the one thing that I do not want to do is die by myself. I think it has something to do with me being put in an incubator when I was born, but nobody knows those effects, I'm not sure of any studies on that lol. Anyways yeah, definitely one of my biggest fears, digress.**

So while I'm going through these pictures and seeing all of these people who have had impacts on my life I just start to think, got dammit I'm the reason these people only talk to me once a year, when I actually decide to show myself at home. Whatever, the past is the past right?

This lead me to think, damn it'll probably be the same thing with people that I've met in college. I'll have a few people that I'm still cool with then the rest just face to face associates.

Then this lead me to thinking about careers, and life, and finally death. And somehow I came to the realization that I am the reason that I will have to be in the situation that I am most scared of... whatever digress.

So after this I started thinking about people from my past, and how I've helped them out (at least I would like to think so). Of all these people, do I still talk to them? Do they still need people to talk to? and so on and so forth.

I guess this rant end with a pretty obvious claim and a challenge. People die everyday and no matter what the age is, it always seems unexpected or too soon. These people that you've had stories with, laughed with, cried with, they're not promised a certain amount of time on this earth man. And the shittiest feeling in the world is if that person passes away and the only thing you can say is, it's been so long since I've talked to them, or Damn, we used to be so close.

So my challenge to anyone, Idk if people even read these shits but whatever, is to reach out to a couple of these people everyday in your spare time. See if they're ok. See if they're accomplishing their goals and dreams. At the very least, pray for protection and energy for them. Because you don't want to be that person at the end of your life wondering who cares that your time is coming to an end, or if you made an impact on people's lives.

You can't change the past, but you can reflect on it and use it to change your future. Learn from the lessons that you teach yourself during self-reflection. You're the only person that truly knows what you need to do in the end.

Whatever, my thoughts.

-Marcus J.

The Lessons from the Life of Socrates

OK, so for this post I'm not doing anything but ranting about how messed up the system is. Education, government, religion, etc. They're all systems now. They're all set up where an individual who asks questions that stump the higher ups or who tries to simplify things are looked down upon and outcast.

This all came to my mind when I was reading about the life of Socrates. I've always heard Socrates quotes, or read his writings, or his foundations that he laid for Western philosophy, but I had never really heard about his life.

**Side Note: I've been researching what people have done in their 20's to achieve levels of great success because I believe I am destined for that summit. Not trying to reinvent the wheel, I'm just trying to combine great people's footsteps and walk the same path. Hate if you want, join if you want.**

Anyways, you hear all about this great philosopher, arguably the greatest known to date, but you never hear about his life and death. So I researched it, not hard to find I just Google'd it. Found several pages so I went through them all. The most interesting page was a page that detailed the Trial of Socrates with the background to his death. -Since Socrates actually didn't write much, much of the details are found through Plato's writings, since he was Socrates' student and witnessed everything first hand. Or Xenophon, or however you spell it, because he was a student and a historian who may have been more accurate. I digress.

If you don't know the story it's pretty deep. This is basically what happened. Socrates was known as the wisest man in Athens or the surrounding areas because of his philosophy and all that he did, no surprise. He was regarded as a great man, until he disclaimed being wise.

"I know that I know nothing" is what he said, right? So from this point he went and questioned all of the authority of Athens until they were proven to not have the answers he was looking for. He did this to many greats in Athens, including politicians and councilmen, until he began an uproar.

Well of course these people in power don't want to be proven to be just normal people after all, so what did they do? They sentenced him to death by poison. Why? For corrupting the minds of the youth and impiety.

He also could have got out of his death by having his following convince the guards to let him out, but he took it like a boss and said he would stay for it was his time to die and no true philosopher fears death. My nigga. I digress.

Now did he do anything wrong? No. He publicly questioned the wisest men in the state, which is what you are supposed to do when you need answers right? Then he belittled them by saying that he was unwise, which them angry because of the paradox that he was the wisest man in Athens. Go figure.

So they killed him. Flat out made him drink some poison and told him to walk until he couldn't feel his legs, then lay down so the poison could get to his heart. Pretty ruthless.

How does any of this relate to the system? Simple. I'll give you a few examples from my life personally.

Many times as a Christian you are told to ask WWJD, right? but if you check The Gospels, the answer to that question doesn't exist when you're in your 20's. So, what have I been doing? I have been asking people what did Jesus do when he was my age. Did I receive any answers that have pleased me yet? Nope.

As a Christian, any religion, you must believe in blind faith or whatever, but what if that's not good enough? And, if you've read previous blogs, The Bible is very loosely translated and even the perception of Jesus has been tainted throughout Europe and into America, so why must I believe everything that these tainted church's have told me if they cannot answer this question?

Why am I not allowed to ask what Jesus was doing when he was my age, but I am supposed to believe that he lived without a single sin for 33 years on this corrupt earth and is the sole way to everlasting life? What is the problem with this simple question?

Easy, it can not be found by the majority of preachers. You know the same ones I talked about leading these corrupt churches. The system wants you to go to their services, give them money, and listen to the same little excerpts that they pick out of this loosely translated Bible instead of asking questions that they cannot answer.

Another example, ask a politician what's wrong with socialism. In a time where the top 1% of the country, who have made their money off of corrupting millions of people since the slavery days (maybe even before) to get their wealth that they continue to stretch to the point of no return, what's wrong with them giving money to the rest of the people who are driving the government into debt, from what politicians say, because of Social Security and government programs like food stamps and things of the sort?

Why can't those people, who spend millions of dollars on private jets and competing to have the largest super yacht give that money instead to black communities that have been on the decline since Reaganomics disrupted the black family and the black power movement started in the 60's and 70's. Digress.

Aren't these fair questions? I would like to think so, right?

Another question, why are people scared of a revolution when this sole thing is what this nation was founded on? If the system's broke, like our forefathers believed England was, you go to any means you can to fix it! And the government knows it's coming. Their preparing police all over the nation with hollow tip rounds and kevlar like they're preparing for a war. Armories that were dormant are being revitalized like an invasion is coming, but what America doesn't know is that the invasion is coming from within. I'll digress on this point until a later post, but if you don't believe me get on YouTube and search Civil Unrest in America. Crazy stuff that's happening without people even being aware of it. Whatever.

Back to the point

What happens in this system, is these questions are frowned upon. People who ask questions are written off immediately while the media portrays everything as "evil" and not as good as what we have now. WELL CLEARLY WHAT WE HAVE NOW ISN'T FUCKIN WORKING!

As a kid, you're only allowed questions in class when you raise your hand. If the teacher doesn't know, and the child continues to ask they are placed in detention or timeout or whatever.

If you ask these questions in church, you are written off as not having faith or some other question is brought up to make it seem as though you are wrong.

If you bring these questions up to a politician you are seen as a radical or a terrorist that doesn't have faith in the country.

I could really go on all day about the way the world doesn't want you to ask questions, but please don't give in. If you have a feeling, or there is something that goes against your logic question it until you find an answer.

My greatest hope with this blog is that by some way of the universe people spread it and see the questions that are on here and spark questions of their own. Because, there are answers for everything it's all a matter of how hard you are willing to search before you find them.

I'll be done with my rant now. I hope you read all of the way through.

As always feel free to comment where I was wrong or your personal opinions I appreciate all thoughts and perspectives that are given with respect.

These are just my thoughts.

-Marcus J.

How Do You Fight What You Can't See? [Part I]

Hello all. Don't really have a direction in this post but it is something that has been on my mind so I figure I'll work on this post for a couple of days to get my thoughts out and see if I come to any type of conclusion.

If you are unaware, I am biracial. On top of that I come from a lower socioeconomic neighborhood and family tree. And when I say that I mean both of my parents income when they were together still did not reach six figures. Now that they are divorced and paying college tuition, times get tough from time to time.

Being faced with both of these barriers I was faced with a lot growing up, and not a lot in a sense where I couldn't make it by with what was provided me -problems are all relative to what you know- but I definitely overcame many obstacles to get to where I am now.

But in overcoming those obstacles I let some things sink in throughout. You know, the obstacles that are the hardest to overcome. The ones that don't come in from a direct decision but from observations. Of these, insecurities, inferiority complexes, many psychological issues, and false understandings which were never directly debunked to me.

I believe this is how things such as class-ism and racism continue to stay so strong in the minds of people. Of course they began with the utmost of ignorance, but through that ignorance stereotypes were born and raised. As time continued, and systematic racism continued, stereotypes spread faster than people could. I'll digress for the time being.

As I've stated in an earlier blog, I've been reading a book called Brainwashed by Tom Burrell. I'm not going to go in depth on the book but it is a book that challenges the Black Inferiority complex. This is the belief that black people are not as intelligent, sexual beasts, violent/loud, etc. (you know the stereotypical thoughts of black people that was established during the implementation of slavery and held onto ever since). This book has made me think of many things, though.

Coming from a place where many people have these thoughts that they are inferior, I decided that although the BI complex is a great burden there is an even greater complex that allows class-ism to be just as influential, if not greater. It is true many black men and women get hit with the double whammy, but (seeing how my white family is not much better off) poorer white people are not far ahead.

The belief that these rich people and people in these positions of power deserve it because of what they have done is sometimes ridiculous. This false "majority" who continues to make laws and rules which work for them is a wash. The fact that I watched my dad for the better part of my life work 12-15 hour days, make almost nothing due to his salary, and then lose his job while the CEO shut down the company and took the money they wanted to be good is ridiculous. Tell me who deserves what? I digress, the universe comes around for everyone. That's a fact.

So one thing that has been on my mind for a while is, how do you fight these things? Personally and as a society? And above that, how do you get people to see that there is something wrong with this system when they're comfortable with it?

Why are black people fine with living in "the hood" and why are other people fine pretending like the nation is perfect. How is it possible to spread knowledge about the wrong doing of the "majority" when the actual majority fails to realize the power they have?

Then when people finally get to a position where they can tell of the evil, they get written off as being crazy or killed. So who is actually willing to ride for the cause when their life is the sacrifice for the greater good?

These are questions that people have had for years, but somehow in this new generation we stopped fighting. We became complacent. We left the work of our grandparents and parents at the door, while we chill in the house.

This is really just a rant, whatever, but what will it take to rally people? And not just for long enough to allow America to write it off, but enough to make an actual change. To put all of these "false prophets" [See last post] in their place. Whether they be politicians, pastors preaching in the name of the Devil, teachers teaching their history, or people in the media spreading the lies of the nation to the masses.

I have many questions but no answers. I figured I would start with a blog, ta da, but above putting my perspective into words, how do you foster change in an age where being complacent is praised and being a revolutionary is terrorism. If I recall correctly, this nation was based on a revolution. And there have been several since which have shaped this country.

How do we begin one in our generation? How do we take the country away from the old ways of thinking and implement change? After all, the technology age is forcing everyone to adapt faster in every aspect. Consumer goods, business practices, even dating is different everyday. Yet we still abide by the same rules and regulations that our grandparents did. IT'S A NEW DAY!!

As soon as people begin to wake up change can be made, but people continue to sleep walk through these times because they are "comfortable." But one day, that comfort will be all fucked up and everyone will be wondering what happened.

Our government is out of date. When milk spoils you replace it. When a player on an NBA team gets too old and tired, he is traded or released if he refuses to retire. We see this common theme in every aspect of life, yet are comfortable with it in the government and ways of thinking about people and classifying people. COME ON MAN!!

I guess the base of my questions is a list of why's and how's. So as you can see this is a Part I, because I haven't thought of any answers that I can formulate right now but I will come back and post on this topic later with my solution, which I'm sure will be very entertaining.

Until then just the final questions that I'll be thinking about:

How do we get rid of things that are rooted into our nation (i.e. institutionalized racism)?

How do we get people to see that the nation is no longer a nation of the people/persuade people to take a stand?

How do we expose this "majority" and empower the people?

How do we fight the things that we cannot see?

Just my thoughts.

-Marcus J.

P.S. I don't know if people can follow this one, so as always feel free to leave comments and questions.