Opening My Eyes: Genesis 1-3

Ok so just to start it off I want to post my first set of questions just so people understand what I mean. Questions go as follows:

• First question, I know we can't take these days literally but how long is a day when you're God?
• Chapter 1 Verse 5 God called the light Day and the Darkness Night, everybody knows that. This was the first day. Question lies in that God didn't make the "two great lights" -sun and moon for those who didn't catch it- to rule over the day and night until the fourth day. What's good with that?
• Ok so starting the fifth day, God made the flying creatures and the sea creatures right? Then the sixth day he made the land creatures and all of that. In these "God Days" could this be some type of evolution in relation to what modern science teaches? Just curious.
• When God is creating things, it says he created things after THEIR kind, ex. Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind OR blah blah blah Cattle after their kind. What the hell does that mean?
• In relation to the previous question, it says that Let US make man in OUR image, after our likeness... Who exactly is my bro talking to? And the Holy Trinity does not count as an acceptable answer for this question.....
• Chapter 2 Verse 5 it talks about there not being a man to till the ground. What happened to the niggas he was creating on the sixth day?
• Verse 11-12, why is it talking about the gold of the land in Pison being good and where tf is that exactly?
• Why was the tree of knowledge of good and evil the only tree that we couldn't eat from? Like that seems like something we might wanna know about lol
• Chapter 2 Verse 24, that's deep. I'ma need an explanation.
• Chapter 3, so was the serpent Lucifer at this time or was the snake just not shit from the jump? And how dumb was the woman cuz it didn't take much to convince her
• In Chapter 3 God seems pretty spiteful after they ate the fruit, but seeing how he's supposedly omnipotent and omnipresent how the hell did this happen? Explanation please. 
• Verse 21, so God is the first fashion designer in the universe? That's pretty dope lol
• Verse 22, it says "The man is become as one of us, to know good and evil..." who is he talking to when he says "us" and again, why was this such a bad thing? Explanation please.
• Verse 24, so there is a tree of life it's just protected by this flaming sword? Clarification please. 

*Just a note I'm reading from a King James version 

Just my thoughts. 

-Marcus J.

Opening My Eyes: The Plan

What's good family? Doubt anyone ever reads this anymore because I've been slacking so much on posting smh. But don't worry I have a new plan and I want everyone who reads this blog to be a part of this journey with me.

Background on this plan before I convey the whole thing to you.

So if you've read any of my posts, it is safe to assume that I am a few steps removed from the young Marcus that went to the Christian school and prayed multiple times a day to white Jesus. I've had my questions and my doubts about religion and everything and have been living in a more universal sense over the past couple of years (i.e. praying to the Creator and denouncing organized religion whenever I get the chance)

But something happened today that got my mind going. It's Easter Sunday, Resurrection Sunday, all that fun jazz right? And my friends are all deciding to go to church. I refrain, for the reasons stated above. Now, for some reason, I begin feeling guilty. Almost condemned to an extent. Why? No idea.

Then I come up with this thought. I've been denouncing religion but haven't found the reason why yet. I've just spent years with a radical ideology about the falseness of organized religion and how it is tearing the world apart, which at this point I still believe.

I could go on a whole rant about how church is crazy corrupt and how hypocritical the people who go there are and the dirtiest of people put on their nice clothes every Sunday to feel like the terrible actions that they commit the rest of the week are justified if they pray a couple times, BUT I will refrain and just tell you all my plan.

SOOOO when thinking about why I felt guilty and everything it clicked, I've been having all of these feelings about the church and I've just been sitting back and accepting it. I haven't explored deeply into the Bible and everything that the book contains. I haven't looked into other religions more than just at face value to see what separates them. I have just been sitting back letting time pass by. Disgusting.

So, the plan I came up with is to counteract this bitchassness that I've been allowing for myself over the past few years. What is it? Check it out.

There are 1,189 Chapters in the Holy Bible (shoutout Google for the answer). Break this down and it's just a little over 3 chapters to read each day in order to complete the book in a year. So my plan is, which I began today, to read 3 chapters a day. Through reading, I'll write down my questions, some I'll share on here some I'll just pocket for later, and I'll find different pastors to ask these questions to. Real answers only is what I'm looking for (if you know any knowledgable pastors leave some contact info below) and if by next Easter I decide that Christianity is what I decide to live my life by, then I dive in wholeheartedly.

Side note: If you're a Christian and you haven't done this I suggest you do it too. It's almost like reading the fine print on a deal that kind of deals with the fate of your soul for the rest of eternity. Digress.

Back to the plan. Like I said I'll read the whole Bible in this year's time before next Easter, and if I agree with everything and most/all of my questions have been answered then I'm all in. Back to the good God fearing Christian Marcus that accepts everything in the religion for what it is.

However, if I find things that don't sit right- like my assumption that the Bible tells the story of a certain type of people that do not share my lineage- then I plan on repeating this process with different religions until I find the one that does.

Islam, Buddism, Scientology, you name it, I'll do it. Worst case scenario I find out that I'm against all of them and just have a wealth of knowledge about all man made religion and finally know exactly why I'm against it. Best case scenario, I find the religion that the universe wanted me to find and I become fully absorbed until my mid-life crisis where something like this could happen again lol.

So family, there it is. My plan. The journey should be interesting and most likely hard to keep up with considering that I can barely remember to brush my teeth everyday let alone read these chapters and write fundamental questions, but I think it'll be more than rewarding.

With that being said, if you read this and you have any questions or comments about it let me know. Hit me up and we can discuss what I've found. It's time that we stop letting people tell us what to accept and we find out what's truly best for us.

As always, these are just my thoughts.

Marcus J.

Stressin...

What's good family, just a new post since I haven't posted one in a while.

I'm actually in the middle of a lot of things happening right now but I thought I'd post before I start going a tad bit psycho again. As you can see from the title, the topic of this post is simply stress. But, of course, with me it's never that simple. So I'll share my thoughts.

So as my life stands, I am preparing to graduate in the spring, so I am enrolled full time in class, involved in several organizations, planning a regional conference, looking for full time jobs, trying to balance a social life and living how I need to all at the same time, all while being the introvert who doesn't discuss problems or struggles that I am going through. Easy enough to be a bit stressed right? But that's the furthest thing from what's stressing me out. Well, kind of.

Ya see, although I am very stressed about these things I am mature enough to understand that these are positive stressors. They are stress causers that will be used in my future to determine who I am as a man and what I am able to do in my lifetime. So as opposed to actual stress they are mental and psychological tests placed on me by the universe to prove that I am capable of fulfilling whatever my destiny is. At least that's what I tell myself in order to keep me from going insane.

So what may stress me out instead of this stuff, right? The negative stresses of the world. The injustices, the ignorance, the system people are placed in, the complete bullshit shade that is in front of everyone world-wide. It's all so stressful it physically hurts my heart to think about. Like actual chest pains. But whatever, I'll continue.

What's been stressing me out lately? Ebola, dumb as fuck. Mike Brown's case and bullshit grand jury, dumb as fuck. People and all these new trends, dumb as fuck. It's all pretty stupid to me but the thing that stresses me out the most is the media. Like dammit man, it really just controls everything. Something with the potential to have a positive impact on the way people live like the immediate stream of information has become such a terrible thing that has no substance for the most part. And even the media that has substance, if not swayed, is so hard to find you would be better off just giving up anyways.

The media controls everything people think, indirectly controlling people's actions, then controlling what we accept as a society. And what are we accepting as a society currently? Death, destruction, horror, ignorance, hate, violence, and no regards for humanity or life in any form. We're all being herded into specific lanes by people who are controlling these media giants in order to advance their monetary gain. First thing stressing me tf out. If you don't feel me you should stop reading here while you're ahead.

What stresses me out even more than this? You know all of those stressors that I mentioned to begin, ya know the positive stressors? I'm starting to feel like these type of things are placed there by these overarching bodies too! And instead of everyone working to make a change for the better of all of us, we are caught up on our day to day lives doing the things that people have planted in our minds that are the right way to grow. This is my main stressor.

The thing that gets me is this, the majority of people hate what they do. No one looks forward to going to work, no one receives the money that they think they deserve, no one knows their true power. On top of that there's no jobs, there's no passion, there's no appreciation, there's no love, feels like there's not even humanity in our society. Everyone's just a number that fits their role in our upside down society.

Using myself as an example. I'm in school. Why? I want to better my life, I want to do better than my parents and make sure my children are better off than I was growing up.  But this is what I realized the other day, I'm applying to all of these jobs that pay very well for a person who only obtained a BSE degree and I'm on pace to do very well for myself but what I noticed is the only thing I will be doing is helping myself while the masses are still being destroyed. My ultimate goal is to help my community, and instead of taking large steps to impact the community I'm just doing what I can while maintaining this false dream that society placed on me. Personally, the most important things that I have learned in college have not been in a class room, they've been through observations of my peers and other things (I'll get to that in another post though).

What else have I learned? Most people who are in school are chasing dreams due to their parents, or their friends, or their whatever. But everyone wants to make a change. Idk what I'm even talking about anymore foreal I'm just ranting, but whatever it's my blog I can do what I want.

In my mind it is just frustrating knowing the power that everyone has, but instead of bonding together we just keep complaining about our situations and following how the system is laid out.

Think about this... No one likes paying for college right? It's even free in some countries, but in America it costs hundreds of thousands of dollars. Money that could change people's lives, and even the nation's economy if spent right. Yet we all still pay, year in and year out, and continue to pay. What if one year every college student in America decided we've had enough of this shit, most institutions have billion dollar endowments anyways, we're going to skip our payments as a whole. What would happen to the system? Would they put locks on everyone in the nation? Would they panic? Would the system be shook? What would actually happen?

Or what about this.. What if everyone who hated their jobs, ya know the people at the bottom of the totem pole, they just all decided not to go to work one day? They actually figured out that the executives who do half or less of the work they do make 60% more, and they just stop. What would happen to the flow of things? How would the system react?

What if everyone who can't afford food for their family just all got together and decided to go to the grocery stores together, workers at the stores included, and decided "We're not going to pay today because we just simply can't afford it..." What would happen?

So my stress isn't that I have all these things to worry about. I've never been one to complain at the beautiful opportunities the creator has put in my life. My stresses are over people not knowing their power, the elite controlling these people and leading into more ignorance, and the roles that all of us, even myself, are allowing ourselves to be placed into. I'm stressed out about the system and how no one even realizes how we are all a victim of it, regardless if we want to be or not.

And yeah you might think I'm crazy. We need doctors, and we need lawyers, and we need (insert a generic profession here), but the world is pretty damn old and I'm sure the way we're living has to be one that is pretty blind from what life on this earth is really about. Smh, people killing people with no second thoughts, people raping, people lying, people scamming, people just doing anything they can just to get by and the worst are the people who figure they have wealth so they can just escape it all. At the end of the day every soul on this earth is interconnected in some kind of way, I just pray people will begin to realize it before it's too damn late... If it isn't already...

But fuck it what do I know right? I'm just an engineer who's struggling to graduate, lol.

I wish people would wake the fuck up, including myself...

Thanks for the rant, fam.

As always, just my thoughts...

Marcus J.

Riots vs. Reform

Watsup famliy? I know I've been absent for a minute, I seem to keep starting posts and only saving them as drafts because of the length of them and the different things I have going on, but please believe everything will start coming out slowly but surely. Thanks for rockin with me this long.

As you could've guessed this post will be about the recent situations in which the police have been gunning down unarmed men, and though the main focus was on Michael Brown, it also happened outside of my hometown of Ohio (man was gunned down in a Walmart for having a BB gun). 

What is my personal opinion on the matter? Well more and more, I am starting to become indifferent. I will explain, briefly. As stated in one of past posts, "MJ's 50 Year Theory", the injustice that we face as African-Americans in the United States has never gone away since slavery, but has only altered. Most times, when it alters we begin to get comfortable again, and the false majority gladly eases back in more extreme than they were to begin with. This is messed up right? So why would I start becoming indifferent instead of enraged? Well, simply put, because of my observations on the masses. I'll explain.

And just to note, this in no way is to say that as a race we have no hope, but it is written to make you think and quite possibly feel some type of way about these thoughts. If you don't you may be part of the problem that I am addressing. 

So my indifference comes from the masses. The short term memory that our community has and the lack of sacrifice that people are willing to endure to make a substantial change. It seems to be like a terrible sitcom, like one of those weak ass Tyler Perry shows that only would be shown on TBS -btw F Tyler Perry, digress.

But do you understand what I want to say? I feel as though since I was in high school its been one racial tragedy after another. Each becoming worse and worse and what happens? It sparks a riot of some sort. People hit the streets for a day or two, let out some aggression, a couple of people get arrested, wounded, etc. then go home and wait for the next tragedy. And what does the oppressor do? They see how far we'll let them go. 

Example, Trayvon Martin, right? They said he "attacked" Zimmerman even though he had DIRECT orders from the local police to stop fuckin stalkin the kid. BANG, now he's dead, another African-American male shot down by someone racial profiling. And what did our community do? We wore T-Shirts, we had a couple rallies, we said "FUCK THE MAN", then went right back to partying and turnin up. So the fire dwindled to a couple flames. All the while, there were like 4 other cases of young black men getting shot, especially the one where the nigga got shot at a gas station in the face by a white man because he wouldn't turn his music down! SMFH. I'll move on.

So these things keep happening, right? And now this new situation happened. They shot an unarmed man, who had his hands up, and idek what their reasoning is this time foreal, that's how you can tell that they really don't care anymore lol. And what's happening? Oh, you know, the riots start, dumbasses start looting, and in a couple of weeks or months people will go back to their lives, the whole while they destroyed their own neighborhoods, and go back to accepting their fate as not shit in the public eye. And so on and so forth. With only a couple sparks still lit from the wildfire.

Now, to explain my indifference, if you haven't caught on. We're all being blind. We're living in the same damn system that our elders were when they started the civil rights movement. True, it was worse back then with lynching being a whole public spectacle, but I'd be curious just to see the black men and jail now vs. then and the comparison of recorded lynchings with recorded black men shot by "intimidated" men and police. For some reason, my logic tells me they wouldn't be too far off of each other. Shit, if it wasn't for the media they'd still probably be public spectacles in some places. I digress. Back to my point.

My indifference comes in seeing that this pattern is not ending, and will not end until people wise up. It seems like the sparks that are left try to catch on with other people, but by that time there's nothing left to burn until you have something new. We waste all of our anger on events instead of the system, which makes our aim short term instead of on the bigger picture. Put that along with the fact that the government is actually scaring people to death by these public showings, and we damn near have the hunger games on our hands.

Now, my main point. This is what differentiates riots and reforms. Riots are short term because they are near sighted. They aren't looking for the bigger picture because all that they see is in front of them. They're not trying to change the system, they're just products of being reactive to the system. And although they gather the masses for the week, month, or couple of months, they do not have nor are willing to bear the pain of a reform.

See, a reform is much different. These are led by the visionaries that open people's eyes to the bigger picture. These visionaries are often killed by "anonymous" people in order to scare the masses back into their "riot only" space though. The thing is, though, a new visionary always rises. Reforms are held to challenge the system and change the injustices, whether through peace or through action. And in reforms, the people have to be willing to bare the pain of the world in order for generations that come after them to live in a better place, or to keep the torch burning. 

I mean damn, during the civil rights movement they were spraying niggas with fire hoses from 3 feet away. I got hit with one of those from 20 feet away and it left a bruise! They sicked the dogs, they beat, bloodied, and killed people. It happens like that in reform. Because one day someone realizes, "Well damn, if it's happening already anyways we might as well make it happen for a reason."

The difference for our generation, there's a lot more than just black people who are hurting. It's not just black and white anymore. Hispanics, actually many types of immigrants, blacks, whites, it doesn't matter anymore. People are starving, people are hurting, people are dying. The media paints it as a race war in order to separate the people into categories so we don't stand as one, and they smart as hell because it always works. But what people don't know is that they people controlling the media are controlling the police pensions, controlling the stock markets, controlling the market goods, shit even control the politicians. I talk about the false majority because they're the enemy. That's the meaning of a reform, to unite the people against them, and make them change the way things are handled. I digress.

So my indifference comes from this never ending cycle of our society being reactive instead of proactive. And if you don't understand what I am saying, ask yourself this question. If we know we live in a society where this is even a possibility, where unarmed men can be gunned down with little to know consequences, then why are we just sitting here? And what will it take for it to stop happening?

If you can't answer these questions with a logical answer, even after thinking about it time and time again, you tend to either get frustrated or indifferent. You know where I am.

Just my thoughts.

Marcus J.

Questioning Universal Laws?

Watsup family? So this post might go along with my last couple, but whatever it's my blog right? I can say whatever I want to. I'm sure somebody out there is going to see it and begin to think about something relevant.

So with that being said we're back at the topic, as you can see from the title, of the universe. You could actually write about the universe all day, every day and come up with new conclusions all of the time just because it's so vast and we keep coming up with different things, but I'll go on later.

This post is about a couple universal laws I've been researching, starting with the Law of Vibration. If you've read my old posts you would've seen I've talked about this before. How everything in the universe is nothing but energy, vibrating at different frequencies which ultimately gives off the illusion that somethings are completely solid and all that stuff right? Won't preach on it, but it's a pretty cool thing to think about if you have some time to look into it and think about it.

Anyways, so recently I've been borderline obsessed with these type of laws and theories. I think I get this way of thinking from my Grandma Joy honestly, she always is talking about the coolest theories of the universe, but I'll save that for another day.

Back to the point, this Law of Vibrations is the base for a "law" -only use the quotation marks because I'm not sure how much of a law it truly is by scientific standards- called the Law of Attraction(s). This law is pretty cool too. It's pretty much karma except a little deeper than that. So basically what it says is this energy that your body exerts from your everyday life -you know, since your body is simply energy from your thoughts to your matter- determines what happens to you/what the universe sends in your direction. The law is in effect every second of every day, right? And whatever has happened to you has been attracted by your thoughts and actions. Think you guys got it by this point.

**Side Note: for a quick reference I found this little WikiHow thing when I was looking through stuff for this, lol. Seems pretty straightforward (http://www.wikihow.com/Use-the-Law-of-Attraction)**

So I had a bit of a split feeling about this law, right? And I know many of you guys will be able to see my thinking.

So my first thought was about people who are products of their situation? Not the people who are lazy, or just do dumb shit all the time, but people who are actually placed in situations with little to no way out, ya know? Example? Kids who are taken from their parents and forced to fight at a young age, or a kid that's homeless and has to face the realities of life from their earliest memories. I could go on but I think you'll get the point.

Does this law apply to them? I don't really have an answer, this is more of a question I've just been thinking about so if you have any input leave a comment, lol.

My next question was, does this law apply to actual physical needs or universal energy? Say you put all of your mind in soul into being an artist, right? There's no doubt in your mind you will be the greatest artist of all time. You beg the universe for the energy, and do nothing but master all of your artistry. Do you get satisfaction out of other people believing that you're the greatest artist of your generation and you get paid or do you get a universal high for all of the energy that you've asked for, type of thing, ya know? Also, didn't come up with any type of answer for this, just another thought.

My final thought, probably the most prevalent thought in my mind, is if it's really that easy why don't people actually do it? I've seen many people discuss this in their interviews, right? The most prominent figure is probably Will Smith. He talks about it in all of his bigger interviews, and about how the universe is a river that you can make go around you. He actually says some brilliant stuff. Like foreal, just YouTube some of his interviews about the keys to success and the universe. Da gawd... digress.

But if we know what to do to make these things happen, why doesn't everyone do it? Is it the stifling system that causes people to give up their ambitions to fall into a cookie cutter copy of what it needs to advance? Is it that people can't possibly believe that it could actually be that easy to determine their destiny? Or is it that people are just unwilling to sacrifice their physical wants in order to operate on a higher spiritual plane? Still, I have no answers.

Is it a combination of all of these things, is it people who have used these means to gain success scared that everyone will be able to take what they have achieved, is it a reciprocation of what someone's soul has done in a past life? What is it really? I got mad questions that I plan on asking the Almighty someday, I digress.

Last thought I'll leave you guys with, what if everyone (or even a majority of people) were able to achieve their ultimate successes through using this law? What would be able to happen to the planet we live on, the society we live in, the age we are present in? I know I posted about Utopia a couple weeks ago, but I don't think that is what would happen. I think the time we would live in would be a lot different, and happier, and successful, but what would it actually be like? Who knows right?

Anyways, maybe I'll readdress these questions with my own thoughts another day, but for now I'll just continue to think as I listen to Jimmy Cliff, haha. But I do ask if you read this to think about the questions I asked, and come up with your own answers. I feel like if enough people come up with answers it could be a key that would unlock potential in countless people. And in the direction we're headed, that's exactly what we need.

Leave comments, questions, rebuttal. All with respect, please.

Just my thoughts.

Marcus J.

P.S. My blog has made it passed 1,000 views now, so if you are someone who reads this blog from time to time I just want to say thank you, and hopefully I continue to say stuff that interests you. Let's FUTW!

-Marcus J

Contradiciton...

Ok, so I know I just finished my other post but Bitches Brew got me thinking, like it always does, so I had to post a quick something about the amazing contradictions that are in our everyday lives. Real quick.

Contradiction:

a :  logical incongruity

b :  a situation in which inherent factors, actions, or propositions are inconsistent or contrary to one another

Straight from the Merriam-Webster, right? But think about how many contradictory things you notice everyday. Example, the universe (or multiverse) contradiction. Think about this, the known universe is currently millions of light-years in radius, and more is being discovered everyday. Then think about how irrelevant your life is in terms of the universe. Shit, even planet earth has billions of people with people being born and dying every day. So this makes you feel useless huh? Then think about the people you have encountered in your life time, the people you have directly effected their lives. The countless people you still have to meet and encourage and pick up. Your life isn't pointless in that aspect, right? This contradiction is the perfect thing to keep people humble and confident at the same time, right?

Or think about knowledge, right? If you know about my infatuation with Socrates you know my favorite quote of his is about how he was wise because he knew he knew nothing. But he was still one of the smartest men living in his time (can be debated but don't kill my vibe). 

Or think about the darkness in the world. Every day people get raped, murdered, cheated, etc. But think about the potential to change, and all the good people can do if they put their mind to it! I would hate to live in a perfect world, then nobody would know pain. But to live in a society that is working to actually clean up the bullshit that we live in right now? I would love that!

These contradictions that just happen, the angel and devil on your shoulder and everybody's shoulder in the world, these are the things that make life worth living. Sorry to say, I personally believe if you make too many deals with the devil you get placed back here in a worse situation, but if you make these right moves your energy gets to go on and do what only the creator knows. 

Embrace the contradictions, man. Understand them, observe them, study them because at the end of the day they're all placed there by the universe and there's nothing that you can do about them. The more you know about them the more you can use them to your advantage.

If anybody has any examples I'm down to listen to some because I think it's one of the coolest things ever. Stars turn to black holes, carcasses turn to oil, even shit turns to fertilizer lmao. It's the way of the universe man. Damn whoever made this place is amazing. All praise to The Creator.

 Ok, I'm done now. Just had to let that one out real quick. Comment, question, criticize. Do so with respect.

Just my thoughts.

Marcus J.

The Conscious Negro...

Quick note - If you read this while you listen to Bitches Brew by Miles Davis it might make it cool, lol. Enjoy!

Hey everybody, back with another post today from some thinking and research that I was up to these past couple of days. This post, titled "The Conscious Negro", is what I believe to be a modern day rendition of the famous W.E.B. Du Bois theory of the African-American double consciousness that he spoke on in many of his writings. Soooo let's get into it!

Where did this come from, you may be wondering, right? (Well, maybe not if you read these posts from time to time you'll see there's a trend, lol) but this post, like all my others, came from somewhat of a minimal thing. 

If you know me personally, you would know that my favorite artist out at the time is J Cole. His story, his flow, his artistry within the rap/hip-hop genre right now is something that can only be paired with the greats. He's really a modern legend that we're watching emerge right before our eyes, well and Kendrick and people like that, digress. 

So I'm listening to J Cole songs on shuffle, anything from The Warm Up to Born Sinner and I don't know what it is, but I feel like he really tells a similar story to mine. Of course as an artist you're supposed to connect with the listener, but anything from being mixed to making it out of a rough neighborhood to go to college, it just all connects. But through his projects you can see a theme, right? And if this post relates to you, you should check out his music too.

The theme? This type of bipolar syndrome that comes from the contradictions that you've seen in your life. This love for life and everything that makes it what it is to you, but also this undying hatred from the lives that you've seen. I'll explain further, on my behalf - I don't know J Cole personally so don't quote anything I say about his lyrics and how I interpret them. Cool.

But for example, growing up I didn't realize that my family had money problems. We were happy. I have the best family in the world, man, swear to the Almighty. My family has everything money could never amount to, from love to trust to actual friendship and memories. I love my family; both sides black and white. Digress, I could go for days about that. 

Anyways I never realized we weren't, you know, "well off" financially until I began getting older. Slowly I started realizing how this whole system worked, right? It wasn't until I applied for schools, and got into college that my eyes were opened. I've talked about it before so I won't hark on it too long, but it's ridiculous that someone can make millions of dollars, sometimes billions, and all they do is sit somewhere and chill all day, if they even do that much. Like do people understand the Mars family are all on the USA most wealthy list and have not worked a day in their lives? Meanwhile there are people who work 55-60 hours a week and make less than $50,000. Like if you don't think that system is stupid as fuck, please explain to me.

Anyways, so I'm listening to J Cole and these themes arise time and time again, and it sparks some thoughts in my mind that I've always kind of had but I never researched. So I came along Du Bois "double consciousness"  theories and read them for a couple days. And while what he says is brilliant and I believe time-less, I believe there's a new element that can be added to this theory.

So, this post is about the "conscious negro" in today's society, in particular in my generation. Generation Y, where blacks are portrayed as hip-hop junkies and you're either a hipster/thug that "turns up" or you're someone who went against the stereotypes and went to school and all that jazz. Mind you, I respect all of these people. This post is for when someone is the combination of the two.

If you read my post "I F**k Up..." you'll see I have vices that I try to deal with. I've been getting better to some degree but it seems no matter how hard I try, it's almost ingrained in my mind that these things are a part of me... it's actually shitty. And that's where this post comes from, because I know I can't be the only one.

So for the conscious negro of today's age, and yes I will label myself as one of them. We know, are conscious, of the contradictions in our lifestyle. The ying-yang that is ever so apparent in our lives. We know that we are conscious for a reason and that we are here for a greater purpose, but we still have these demons. We know the money we waste every so many days on liquor, drugs and partying (or whatever you do) and we know what we could do if we saved that money, but we spend it anyways. We know how much time we waste doing some of the BS that we do, and how much we could gain if we were productive during that time period, but we waste it anyways. I could go on for a while with examples but I'll stop there.

This is not new, by the way. I'm sure MLK had the same problems, knowing that a black man is supposed to be strong for black women and be above adultery yet he still had his missteps. Point proven.

But for our generation it is different. Point being, there is a major divide today. Between the different type of people that are in different points in their lives. I am not sure how to connect to a 14-15 year old who has already started selling drugs just to make some side money. But I know it's happening, though. I know because those were my friends when I was younger. Not bad, just misguided. Not ignorant, just knowledgeable in the wrong walks of life. This is where I believe this "conscious negro" holds the power and promise of our generation.

**I've been bouncing around this post, but I'm listening to the album Bitches Brew by Miles Davis and it's got my mind everywhere so just bear with me. I'll make my point coming up soon. lol**

So for the conscious negro of our generation. The ones who know what it's like in the rough neighborhoods, but also know what's happening in the corporate world as well. The ones who are in between, with a foot at the bottom of the barrel and the other still walking up the steps. For all of us who can swear that we're bipolar because it makes no damn sense why we can love and hate so much at the same damn time, I'm talking to you all. It is our job, our duty to start a movement. And not a movement that only will engage people who were already on the right path, a movement that brings power to the people. Regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation. Shit the Black Panthers did so much work for the LGBT and white poverty communities, they just don't teach you that because they try to paint them as a certain type of group, whatever. 

Anyways, it is up to us to spark the fire. I write this on the 50 year anniversary of the 1964 Civil Rights Act, and can say without a doubt that there is still much work to do. I believe we are the only ones who can connect our suburban friends who we met in college to the "hood" friends that we grew to be who we are with. We are the ones who have seen more than one layer on the totem pole and have made marks in both of them. We have the technology to do so, we have the knowledge to do so, we just need the organization and collaboration to do so.

By this point I probably lost everybody, which is cool. If you made it this far do your own research on Du Bois and "double consciousness" then go listen to a song by J Cole titled "2 Face" you'll see what I'm getting at. Our lives are perfect contradictions. Ying-yangs. Until we understand that we cannot make a profound change. Open your mind and become conscious. The world is depending on it, foreal.

I'll leave you all with this quote. 

"To be a Negro in this country and to be relativily conscious is to be in rage almost all the time." - James Baldwin

Just my thoughts.

Marcus J.

Something Quick...

Ok, so just a random rant that I thought would be willing to share. Topic: As a people, we're dumb... Reason (For this particular post): Space exploration....

Now don't get me wrong, I am all for space exploration to a certain point. The universe -or multiverses, if you believe in that type of thing, which is actually a pretty crazy concept, but I digress- is beautiful and full of insane phenomena that we should explore, to a certain extent. My problem? Spending hundreds of millions/billions of dollars to create satellites and fund different programs in order to search for a planet that's habitable.

I was talking to a good friend about something like this, and she said, "What do you think life forms would be like from other planets? Do you think they'll be smarter than us?" My reply, "Yeah, they'll be smarter because they won't exhaust all of their resources destroying their planet and searching for another one that's somewhat close, but still inhabitable for their species."

So my thought for the morning, what if we took all of the money that we spent on satellites searching for "the next Earth" and start working on the real deal first? Because at this point the highest ESI (Earth Similarity Index - something that compares planets to Earth) is like .84... and it's like hundreds of light-years away... And even though it's really cool that we keep finding these types of planets, (nah foreal though, it's cool as shit; there's like 4 or 5 planets that are over .80 which is wild, digress) it's damn sure not going to happen where we find a planet that is 100% in our universe. So let's take that billions of dollars that we're discovering the heavens with and use it to make our world a little more habitable. You know, purify some rivers, save some wildlife, not have people dying of hunger across the world or depending on corporations for every single need, etc.

As a human race, we need to start working on our planet because at the rate we're going, there's not many generations left that'll actually have actual beautiful places on Earth to cherish. They're slowly being destroyed by us, while we look outward instead of focusing internally...

Just my thoughts.

Marcus J

Which Seems More Achievable?

What's good people? New day, new post, same thoughts that came from a random occurrance in my life lol. If this is your first time reading the blog, Welcome. I hope what you read can spark some thoughts for you. If you're reading because you've somehow become interested with how I think, welcome back. Either way I appreciate the love.

SO today, the thought came from a dinner with one of my friends at a Golden Corral. Seems simple right? Check out where it goes though... lol

So we're at Golden Corral, chillin and eating the mounds of food that an all-you-can eat buffet affords for its customers and my mind goes back to my childhood instantly. When I was a kid, every holiday would be spent at Golden Corral. Birthdays, Celebrations, sometimes even holidays such as Easter if no one wanted to cook, but it seemed like we were always at Golden Corral. So the thing that got me thinking was the steak, of all things. I thought about how, when I was a kid, the best steak would come from Golden Corral. (Sidenote: These are all of my personal opinions on any restaurant metioned, I represent no one and have a right to my personal opinion... Don't need any lawsuits coming my way... lol) But, anyways, I loved Golden Corral food, man, it was always on point. Unparalleled to me. Except for Ryan's sometimes, because their mashed potatoes were crazy good, but I digress.

SO I start thinking about the conference I had just got back from, and all of the different things I've experienced since I've left for college. The wealth that some people have, the upbringing of some people, the experiences and my mind has a field day. What was my main thought? My neice's grandfathers. I'll explain why. And this is how I think about many things so pay attention.

Thinking back to my childhood, my dad was always the big dog, man. We went to Golden Corral and he would eat 3 plates of the steak, extra satisfied with every one, maybe a slight comment of how it was cooked but always content with the steak. (I'm assuming you got the fact that my dad is one of my neice's grandfathers and then her other one will also be mentioned.) We never even noticed how low quality the food was. Either because my parents were always satisfied or because we didn't know higher quality, the food was majestic in our (me and my siblings) minds right?

Then, I thought about the other grandfather. And I'm not using any names, just to make it easy for me. But this guy is ballin, right? It seems everytime I see him, he wants to go to the most expensive steak house around. On top of that he always pays for everyone, $50/$60 meals for the whole table... "You wanna beer too?" If you know me you already know my response, lol. But thinking about him in contrast to my father, it was crazy. He's the type to get the steak and if it's not perfect he might have a nice talk with the waiter and request another one (Which makes complete sense if you're ordering a $50 piece of meat). Now, if you are unaware, the steak you get for $50 is a lot different than the steaks which you receive at the golden corral lol. And somehow there's a complete contrast between the two styles. Then, I thought about how my sister's boyfriend has acted once and how we were taught to act. One time we were out to eat and he didn't like something he got so he sent it back, which may not seem like a lot to you all but to me, we were taught never to do that and if we ordered it we better like it. Whatever I'll get back to my point.

But this is how I assume my sister's boyfriend grew up. Not an all-you-can-eat buffet with low quality food that fills you with all this steroid infested food, but with steaks from cows who graized in fields made of the highest quality grass and wheats. (a tad of an exagerration but you get my point, lol) And now, somehow, my neice is the connector between these two types of men, right?

So, I was thinking about this and began to wonder, what makes people satisfied. Clearly there are people who live in poverty who are not well off, but they are happy with their lives. Then there are the kids who parents make tons of money, or the people who make tons of money themselves, and they completely hate their lives and always want more. I know money doesn't automatically equal sanity or a good life, but it definitely takes away the problems of the poor, and that's a shit load of problems.

While thinking of this my mind was racing, really trying to decide what made people the happiest, and if people as a whole could ever be happy at the same time, some type of Utopia, right? Is it possible at all? Or are people naturally not satisfied? And are we headed further and further away from this point of balance? You know, since all of these fuckin reality TV shows depict these fuckin idiots in these big ass houses with their designer clothing and surgeries to make themselves look fake af to have people admire them and directly brainwash half of the nation to sale their morales for money to aspire to be like said fucking idiots and never settle with what they have in material possessions... but I digress.

So my mind led me everywhere, even slept on it last night, then today I woke up and researched the beginnings of the term. Figures Thomas More made it up in England. Thomas More is a G too, King Henry the 8th really did some dirty shit to him, but you can look that story up though. Any ways figuring out all of this stuff about Utopia obviously led me to look stuff up about dystopia as well. And looking at the contrasts in the two along with thinking about the contrasts that I mentioned before I began to think, which of these seems more realistic for society? A utopian society or dystopian society?

So this is all I have been able to think about for the past couple of days, right? Which of these is realistically more attainable? And as optimistic I would like to stay about the human race, I could not even fathom a utopian society. A place where money is the least of people's worries and people only consume what they need and redistribute wealth in order to people who need it. A place where the main concern of the human race is perserving the planet that we inhabit in order for future generations to prosper and grow. (Even the other day some scientist wrote a paper proving that the world is on the verge of the next great extinction, look it up it's crazy as hell) But in thinking about everything that happens in the world today, I could never convince myself that people will ever get it. And even if some do, the false majority will not, and that is what will drive us to the latter.

For those who don't know, a dystopian society is something like The Hunger Games series. A place where the richest have perfect lives, perfect to the point where they're not sure what suffering really is, but behind the scenes is near slave labor. The poor work, starve, die while the rich party, waste and destroy everything, and reap the benefits of old money. And through my thinking, I believe this would be more likely for the world that we live in today.

If you've read my old posts it's evident that I believe in the disconnect between the rich and poor throughout the world, not just in America. I mean shit, affluenza is even a "disease" now that can get you off of murder trials if you were brought up too rich and priveledged... digress. But clearly with the lust of money and material possessions growing at a rapid pace and the appreciation for life and creation dwindling... I'm afraid utopia will never actually even be a thought.

Feel free to disagree with me, but in a world where it's easier to be praised for making a sex tape rather than finding cures for deadly diseases, or put in the spotlight for "twerking" instead of graduating I believe that our society is headed for a modern day Dark Age that will only lead to death and destruction...

I do, however, believe that someday, that will most likely not be in our lifetime, people will snap and be enlightened and recognize that every breathing thing in this universe is connected through something more powerful than anyone can comprehend. There will be a time when people aren't separated by religion because they understand there is no religion, simply because the human mind can't fathom the works of God. We won't be seperated by language or race because people will finally understand that we are all beings that come from the Almighty, and to hate anyone is equivalent to hating your souls reflection in someone else. We'll stop stripping the land for everything it has because, whenever it will be, we will recognize that everything on this planet breathes and has just as much of a purpose as the richest man on Earth. From the trees in the forest, to the millions of animals killed by moving vehicles, down to the homeless people that people often ridicule, we'll recognize the Godly power in every living thing and somehow make a change...

Until that day, though, we're just going to be remembered in history as the generation that destroyed the planet and led our race to one of the darkest periods in known history...

I believe there is time left to change it, but I also doubt people are willing to sacrifice to change it (see my last post)... Hopefully I'm wrong though... I pray that I am, but whatever I'll get out of my hippie mode now haha...

So, as always, feel free to comment, question, rebuttle respectfully... I appreciate any and all feedback... at the end of the day I'm just trying to expand my mind to different perspectives...

As always, these are just my thoughts folks...

Marcus J.

Marcus J's 50 Year Theory

What's good everybody? As stated in my most recent post, I'm back on my game. Studying history, science, religion, the universe and all it entails, and once again making my opinion and thoughts known to the world.

So I know you see the title and you're probably like, "Oh, so now this nigga makin' theories??" Well, indeed I am. And as always, if you have anything to respectfully say to it, please leave a comment and we can discuss. I respect all open thought as long as it is respectful and well thought out, as all of my posts are.

So some back ground on this new theory that I've been coming up with for the past couple of months. It began as I took a trip to my hometown of Dayton. I'm riding through my neighborhood and it seems that all I see is beat down houses, closed businesses, and men and women who look defeated. Yes, defeated is the only explanation that I could use to describe the looks in their eyes. So I begin thinking, as I usually do, why is life like this for us? (It's my hometown, a neighborhood I've lived in since I was 3 so yes I will be saying us, even though I was blessed to make it out) Haven't any of the people here just stopped and thought about the power that lies in numbers? (I'll have anothe post about the power in numbers so I won't go ham right now)

So through all this thinking I think of all of the research I've done on the Black Inferiority Complex and African-American propoganda and how we are taught to hate ourselves from birth, basically, through the American system. (This is a point where I don't really care about your opinions, this is damn near factual) But the thing is, it's not just blacks. It's whites, hispanics, any type of immigrant who is living in poverty. Well shit, any person living in poverty basically. Whatever.

So this led me to thinking about organizing our communities, right? I thought, "Why do we not just organize as a people and demand changes? Nobody enjoys living like this..." This led me to researching "Social Reforms" and revolutionaries, right? And this was the basis of my theory.

Let's take it back to slavery. There were major slave rebellions like every 30-40 years around the world, but that's because the oppressor was physical and apparent so I will start with the American Civil War. The 1860's, full of steps forward for the USA right? Emmancipation Proclomation in 1863 (not sure about that date, but pretty sure) aboloshing slavery from the Union. Abe Lincoln fuckin' shit up "fighting for blacks" (Even though I believe he was just as racist as the next man, he just might've realized it was morally wrong to OWN another soul... or maybe he started the whole thing trying to get votes from the North and purposefully created a rift in the nation, look up the different theories they're actually crazy.. lol digress though) Point being, the 1860's had many things from American black's to be proud about....... Until the nation began to restructure itself with institutional slavery....

So just like that my theory begins, right? I know I haven't said my theory explicitly but hang in there, you'll figure it out. SOOOO, institutionalized slavery. Make niggas free, but poor as shit and dependent on their rich white slave masters to survive and do the work for what may have been cheaper then the slave trades anyways, right? But TELLING these black people they were free was good enough for them, because they had the HOPE of becoming more than slaves someday.... And this is just speaking for America, all types of bullshit was happening in Africa too and the colonization of the kingdoms and blah blah, but I'll focus on America because I'm not too knowledgeable about the African history...

Well about 50 years passes right? And it seems that a whole generation of people begin to realize.... Hold up... We're still just as dependent on the white men as we were when we were slaves... Now remember, some blacks had already been rich through a lot of things, there was a Upper Black Class, if that's what you want to call it, but the majority of blacks were still dirt poor and dependent on white men's crops and corporations. So, the leader emerges, right?

Man by the name of Marcus Garvey starts an organizaion called the UNIA (Universal Negro Improvement Association) and rallies this generation. Does everything for black people, but actually nothing at the same time right? He was just the ultimate visionary. Travels across America and gives speeches to black crowds. Telling them that they are a powerful people and when united they can conquer all. I'm not gonna do a whole history lesson but Marcus Garvey was that nigga man, held it tf down. Unites blacks across the world, starts a newspaper that was published throughout Africa and Europe and plans to unite Negroes across the globe. And WOULD HAVE done it, but this fuck boy named J. Edgar Hoover, "American Hero", starts this project called CointelPro. Remember this for later. Hoover basically implanted agents in the UNIA to disrupt everything and cause the organization to fall to shit, causing it to go bankrupt, all plans to fail, and Marcus Garvey to go to jail and catch a sickness which led to his death. Score 1-0, THE MAN.

Forgot to mention the UNIA was founded in 1914, about 50 years after the end of the American Civil War. So although the UNIA was disrupted in the major plans, it showed the government that minorities could rally together for a cause. They gained small things, you know, a small say in things here and there and it was enough to satisfy that generation because, again, it was more than what they started with. Were they still equal? The WHITE ONLY signs on the doors could dispell that immediatly. That's extra fucked up btw, but I digress.

So what's 1914+50? 1964, right? except it happened a little bit early this time. But although I will talk about the Civil Rights Movement, I don't plan to dwell to much on Dr. King. Mind you he was a fearless leader, who CointelPro also had hands in his assassination, but he was just one man. And he was an older, wiser man. Who I will talk about who came to power to rally the black nation is the Black Panther Party. We all know who the Black Panther Party was, and what they did, but little do people know their ages. They were college students for the most part. Shit, Fred Hampton went to jail when he was like 18/19 and was assassinated when he was only 21. Another operation by the government, but I digress. The Black Panther Party were a group of people, led by Huey Newton and Bobby Seale, who were conscious of the opressor against their people, their neighborhoods, their families, right? They were people who saw the nation for what it was and demanded a change. But, like I said this isn't a history lesson.

So, let's jump 50 years from the 1960's, since most progressive black activists groups lost power before the 1970's, thanks again to CointelPro, I'm tellin you man look up the operation it's crazy! Some say it even had Tupac murdered just for the simple fact that he was unifying gangs across the nation with his Thug Life brand, but they got to him before he changed his rap career to revolutionary.. digress again.

So my theory is, that our generation must take our stand against the evils that are taking place in our country. Every 50 years, it has been placed on the generation that was far enough removed to be conscious of the systematic trials that they are placed in. If you are one of the people that think it's not that bad anymore, then you're clearly not who I'm talking to at this point in my life, because you're living in ignorance and I'm sure it's blissful. For those of you who have been stopped and frisked, who have had cops pull guns on you and your friends, who have been recepients of systematic racism in any realm, YES I am talking to you.

And all the signs have been there, man. Trayvon Martin and the disgusting shit white people did after the trial (Reference the black face paint they did for Halloween and thought it was funny) to the uncharted unemployment for black males in this country, or at that matter the unemployment in inner cities in general, or just how America still continues to fight wars over seas looking for more dirty money instead of investing in our communities which are struggling. Man, if you don't see the need for change get out the fuckin way cuz clearly you're blind. I digress.

I know this post is getting long and y'all might be getting tired of it so I'll wrap it up here soon, but just know it is upon our generation to begin making requests. We are living in a generation where kids don't know who Fred Hampton is but they know Chief Keef, they don't know Huey Newton but they damn sure know some fuck nigga off of one of those reality shows. It is our obligation to educate ourselves on the past in order to oragnize the people and begin making changes, because I fear that if something does not happen within the next decade, it might be too late and there is no coming back.

We cannot just let our culture and society slip into a dark ages where niggas are stuck at the bottom of the totem pole, with no ambition and no liberation. We need to realize how dependent we are on the rich white corporation owners and rally against them. So explicitly, I believe, my theory is, that every 50 years there is a shift in the universe as we know it. The oppressed people of the world are able to focus their anger and agression to people other than their own people, and turn it into a progressive movement. We saw it with the Arab Spring, we saw it across the globe, but yet as African-Americans we are still complacent. As lower class Americans we continue to slave to the richest people in America who run the corporations and spend money that could rebuild cities on mansions and speedboats.

It's up to our generation to become aware, and make a change.

Feel free to comment if you would like to discuss anything or have a different, respectful point of view.

As always, these are just my thoughts...

Marcus J.

I Fuck Up...

Well hello there again family!


If anyone still checks this blog, which I'm sure only a couple people do (Probably only John Doe now, haha) you would have noticed that I have not posted in a looooong ass time. Did my thoughts stop? Never. Did I mismanage time? Of course. But the worst thing is I stopped letting my voice be heard.

The reason I haven't posted in a while will allow people to see several flaws in my character.

1. I procrastinate with the best of them.
2. I easily make excuses when I know I'm stronger than I give myself credit for.
3. I have many vices which put me in compromising positions.
4. Simply put, I FUCK UP!

Now, you might wonder why my first post back is something so trivial. Something as elementary as falling down, right? But it's a fundamental thought that holds us all back, if you think about it. You see, I've come to this realization about people who are a part of today's society, and I can only say today's society because it's all I have personally witnessed. The thing is we, I know I do, like to make excuses because we need a reason as to why we CAN'T reach the greatness we deserve. This can be seen through anything in life, right?

Example, take a good for nothing nigga that cheats on his girlfriend, right? We take our preconcieved notions about relationships and abide by them instead of doing what we know is right. simple decisions go the wrong way, which lead niggas down the wrong paths from the beginning. You know not to get the girl's number, you know not to text her, you know not to fuck her, you know not to lie, scheme, and bullshit but in your mind you might be thinking, "Well I know my girl is the best, but it CAN'T be meant for me to find what I need this early in my life. That's too good to be true, right?" Digress for the time being.

Or another example, when a well capable nigga fails a class he shouldn't. Shit not even failing, cuz in college a C is basically a fail. So what do we do, since we've been taught we were dumb our whole lives and are not as smart as the white mutha fuckas that sit in the front and are "legacy" students. We go, "Damn that dude smart as hell, I CAN'T get grades like him. His whole family is full of engineers [for example] and he just knows his shit. Damn sure CAN'T compete with him in the classroom."

Or looking at social change, right? The people with the big ass monuments in DC, right? MLK (which is actually a fuckin' mosquito bite compared to the real monuments, digress), Washington, Lincoln, Jefferson, etc. Shit even people who don't have monuments that have done major shit. Malcolm X, Marcus Garvey, fuckin' Fred Hampton, anyone who's done it major. We go, "Well, we CAN'T have an impact as major as that person... We just CAN'T do what that person did..."

I've gone on long enough with examples, all of which are things I battle everyday so I know somebody out there feels me. But the thing that I've come to realize is what if in some way we can turn our way of thinking around. Modern science says people use, what, 10-20% of their brains and CAN'T unlock the rest? Or the average African-American from the inner city CAN'T excel at a PWI which rakes up the most research dollers and funding. Or black people CAN'T change how fucked up America is and change a system that has repeatedly been placed and altered to keep the majority of us down as a whole?

I think shit should change. Because no matter how optimistic of a person I think I am, the same old negativity that I was placed in as a child has continued to haunt me to this very day. Being raised in a culture where sex is praised, success is hated, knowledge is frowned upon, and at the end of the day it's cut throats or be sacrificed for someone else to make it, I am a fucked up individual (we're a fucked up society) that all are conscious of the wrong that is apparent in everyday life but regardless play by these dirty ass rules anyways. When people around your neighborhood told you "Don't dream, you CAN'T do that. You'll just be disappointed." I'm here to say fuck all of that. Fuck everything. IDK what I'm even talking about anymore, so let's get back to the point.

I FUCK UP, ALL THE TIME. It's what people do, man. The difference is that we're conscious about it! We have the ability to change. Every time I buy a bottle of alcohol I know that it's money I could save to change the world. Everytime I have a conversation with somebody I shouldn't, I know it'll hurt someone I love. I fuck up man, all the time. We all do. The challenge is to first be conscious of the things that you're doing wrong, whether it be your personal vices or something that our society has hammered so far into your brain its in your subconscious now [check my older posts on BI Complex]. Whatever it is things have got to change, and I'm making the vow now to start it with me.

We only get one chance to change the world, man. [Well if you don't believe in reincarnation but I kinda do so take that for how you want to, digress] And I'm sure the people that've done the most with their time wasted minimal amounts of it thinking that they CAN'T do something, but rather thinking how to overcome the obvious barriers that turn most people away from their own greatness...

With that being said, expect posts from me regardless if I'm taking 18 credits or if I'm not doing shit at work. Becuase the people who have changed the world used the same 24 hour days to accomplish everything they did, and I'll be damned if I let a negative outlook on myself stop me from attaining my destiny.

Thanks for the rant. As always, these are just my thoughts...

Marcus J.

What Do You Stand For?

Hey watsup people? For this post I have a lot of questions, because I can only see this topic through my personal viewpoint so feel free to comment, as always. And though this post won't be as radical as others, at least I don't think once I get goin who knows lol, I still would ask if you have something to say say it and if you read it take it in and question yourself and your life. 

So the thing that sparked this post is an interview I watched with Sean Parker. If you don't know who Sean Parker is, he founded Napster, was on the Facebook board of directors (Justin Timberlake in the movie haha), and now is on some board for Spotify. Why is he important? Good question. I think his story is interesting because he went from a young kid, mad millions by founding Napster, lost it all in court cases for breaching copyrights, then was homeless and bounced back. Now he's worth approximately $2.4 Billion I think. Oh, and he's done all of this and he's only 34 years old. -That's crazy to me, digress.

Anyways, I was watching this interview, right? And it was hosted by Jimmy Fallon or something, and they were talking about how he got started computer programming and his early struggles (he founded Napster when he was still a teenager) and just his journey to where he is now. The one part of the interview that stuck the most to me was a certain part when the interviewer asked if Parker was happy to have regained his capital after being homeless and on the run. And what did he say? "Oh, it was never about the money..." Then he starts talking about how he just loved programming, and then he really loved music, so he put the two together and kept following that passion. 

And I mean of course when you're legally a billionaire you can act like money isn't that important to you. But there was something about the way he answered that you could tell that when he started everything, it wasn't about the money. He really just wanted to give people the opportunity to stream the music they wanted when they wanted to.

And when watching interviews from other billionaires, they all said the same thing. At the origin it was never about the money. Bill Gates said he just wanted to learn as much as he could and connect people. Mark Zuckerberg, Warren Buffet, etc. all of them said from their beginnings it wasn't about the money. Do I believe every single one of them? Hell no, but it's just crazy the uniform answer that they all gave. Digress.

Of course this sparked my thoughts, right? And I started thinking about the way that society is set up now. It's the complete opposite! If you're from a family who isn't extremely wealthy, which most of these men are, you are placed on the path to mediocrity. You are taught to go through the system, get a degree and a decent paying job that you can live on. 

And this belief isn't always placed by parents, it's everywhere! By schools, after school programs, churches, etc. I think that's disgusting. This could go hand in hand with my problems with the educational system in America but I won't do that right now.

The main thing I took out of it is, what would people do if they actually achieved what they wanted to do instead of having their dreams capped off? And how many people do what they do just for the money? And on top of that why would a society ever promote a system in which people are placed on a path to this mediocre system which doesn't allow people to reach their maximum potential. 

Even at my job right now, I hear people talk about how much they despise being at work, but I work at one of the most favored employers in the area. So my logic is it can only get worse right? So I've decided to step off of this path in my future.

I'll probably make a lot less than I was estimated to make with the current degree I will receive, but this is the way I see it. The thing that you do most in your time here on this planet is work. You begin to work at 22-23 if you graduate from college and you retire, eh with how the governments going, around 60-70. That's 40+ years of work, after which you have that same 20ish years to live if you're lucky and your heart hasn't been compromised from waking up earlier than your body is supposed to function, making you drink coffee and other energy drinks which slowly deteriorate your body, but I digress. 

My point is that in America you can either take a step out on faith and chase your own dream, or you can be complacent and chase someone else's; (i.e. working for any company where you work 40+ hours a week just for your work to maybe be recognized in an minescule employee award, digress) so why would you not chase your own? It's easier to follow the path that's laid before you, but it's more admirable to create your own. 

So back to the point of this post, what do you stand for? Are you just out here with no passion at all trying to get a check every week, or are you chasing a dream? And don't get it wrong, you can have jobs that you don't completely love if you have to set yourself up for a future movement, but are you rich and depressed or getting by and joyous?

You only get one chance on the earth, do you want people to remember you as the person who did what they were told or what they wanted and could not be stopped by obstacles? Idk man, I'll probably stop before I preach too much, but the only way for this pre-established system run by big name brands and corrupt CEO's to tumble is by more people taking the path less traveled. 

**First, why would you want to support these people's dreams? Second, why would you make yourself suffer through your entire life like this?**

So whether you want to create a clothing line that people can wear worldwide, or you want to become a doctor and start your own physicians office, or you want to invent something that effects everyone you interact with don't let this system of mediocrity mess you up man. It's clearly the reason our nation continues to lose its supremacy and I feel like it'll soon be debunked (hopefully within our lifetime) but until then, be the person to make that change. Don't keep going down this same road man, because if you chase somebody else's dream you'll never know what true happiness is. That's not your spiritual calling. You'll always have a void in you because you're not doing what you were placed on this earth to do if you have to force your heart to be behind it. Digress.  

I say, while you're still  young and have limited responsibilities (i.e. no kids/one kid, limited insurance, rent instead of a mortgage, etc.) and you have a passion, or are finding your passion, let it shine. Take whatever it is that you're passionate about (if you're not sure watch the news or have a debate with people about real world things, it'll find you before you find it) and find a way to change the world with it. After all, the worst that could happen is that you end up back in the system they tried to place you in anyways, right? But at least you can say you tried. And that passion will keep growing and burning and there's no doubt that you'll be successful, whatever your definition of success is. Promise you that. But I'll end this rant now.

"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all." -Oscar Wilde

Just my thoughts.

-Marcus J.

Who are you?

Stop for this post I chose to go with a more conservative title but the post content is, as I would like to think it is always, thought provoking. And I already know many people well try to denounce this immediately and not give it any thought but for those of you that for some reason read what I have to say on here just think about what I'm saying.

So the topic of this post is religion.If you're dead set on your religion and think there's nothing I can tell you you most likely won't care what I have to say but this is more for you than anyone. And I'll ask a lot of questions so if you have any answers please feel free to provide feedback because I'm just trying to be enlightened.

So the post title "Who are you?" is basically to these people who completely regard other religions as fictional. No matter what the religion it is that you count out, whether it be polytheism of the ancient Egyptian societies or it be Islam, this post is for you and the people who think like you.

Growing up in my Christian home, Methodist church, and Christian school during developing years in my life I was always very inquisitive. One question that I would always find myself asking is how can someone tell me that Jesus is the only way to heaven. Like no matter what, if you lived after Jesus died for our sins and didn't accept him you go to hell. Never bought into that whole thing whole heartedly, and I'll tell you all of my reasoning as to why.

When I was in 7th grade I did a project on Mohandas Gandhi. I studied how he held peaceful rebellions against the imperialist British government and how he sacrificed so much of himself for the peace of his nation, his homeland and his people. I admired the stories of him and all he did. Mind you this time I was in a Christian school, so one day I asked my teacher "Do you believe people such as Gandhi go to hell if they don't believe in Jesus?"

My teacher not ready for such a question at first would not answer. She was a sweet older lady, I won't expose her name but if you went to EDCS it was in history haha. Anyways after she didn't answer I asked her again. This time she replied, "Why yes. If he did not accept the Lord Jesus into his heart it unfortunately means he did."

If course this bothered me, right? Because how was he supposed to do such a thing when the people who were harassing his land had originally came in the name of Jesus? I'll digress on this point for the time being.

So this lead me to think, what about all off the people worldwide who had not even heard of Jesus? I mean after all Gutenberg didn't even make the printing press until the 1400's and by then I'm sure the Bible was not worldwide. So for these millions of people who died in this timeframe did they all go to hell too?

When I was in high school I was never allowed to get such questions out and always kept things like this under wraps, but in college I have relearned to question so this thinking emerged again. And now my question is who was the idiot that made religion an all or nothing thing? Yeah I said idiot.

Who became so blinded by this loosely translated Bible that we have today and said there's no other way. And I'm no master on Islam but who said that their religion is the only one which will get you to heaven? So to the point of the title I am saying "who are you?" To count out someone's religion as wrong, because these type of things are clearly for the gods and the passed spirits so how can anyone on this earth discount anything?

It is well known that many religions in today's society have very similar origins, and Islam even credits Jesus as a great profit if I'm not mistaken, so why did we ever turn to just discrediting a whole religion? Or was it a choice of the people? Digress.

Next question is what do you think about people in ancient societies thought about their religion off the time? Ancient Egypt, Greece, Babylon... what about them? The people whose spirit was of great purity and only believed in the religion of the time because it was what was spoon feed to them from birth, much like people's religion is now. Are all of these people burning in hell now because they were never reached by the God of Judah which had reached us all?

Who are we to count out their religions as well? And you might say but what about the dark ages and how their religions allowed kilos and stuff but just think about all the people that say they're Christians and do terrible things. We might be half way in a dark she right now foreal, but I'll save that for another day.

**Note: I'm writing this at midnight knowing I have to be up in six hours for work. I couldn't sleep and this has been on my mind for some time. Just laying here listening to classical music vibing and venting. So if this is a little different than my other posts know I'm in a more comfortable setting, digress.**

Lately I've been studying Hinduism, Buddhism, and other things of that nature and with comparing them to what I was taught growing in the Christian church I believe there is space for every religion. Above that I think religion is made to help teach morals to the masses. Even some more radical translations of the Bible place Yeshua, sometimes known as modern Jesus, as a man sent from God who was given to the earth to show people the way to live righteous. Whether he said he is the only way to heaven, that's debatable.

Idk man. I could go on for days about this so I'll probably wrap this up soon, but if you take anything from this just know there's many things about religion that many people will never know. You can study any of the holy texts that are in this world, but at the end of the day religion should never be used to tear people of the Almighty's creation away from each other. It should be to make us more aware of our neighbor and to make the Almighty pleased by bringing positive energy to this world while we inherit it and reaching those that come after us the same things. Not fuckin arguing about who's right like some stupid ass toddlers.

I just pray that everyone realizes what's at stake for the world if things continue this way and can start to change things from this cookie cutter process that's been outgrown.

No matter who you pray through, make sure it's with a whole heart and Godly intentions. And before you start to automatically disregard someone's view of the Almighty power in the universe, make sure you ask yourself "who am I to judge this?" or you might be what's actually wrong with the world today, not their beliefs.

It's late now, I've ranted enough, and I'll probably have to drink coffee at work tomorrow just to stay awake so I'm done.

As always, just conveying my thoughts to who cares to read them.

-Marcus J.

If Not Now Then When?

Ok so for this post it's somewhat radical but whatever, if you don't like where I'm going with it feel free to stop reading. Might go on a couple tangents on this one but just follow what I'm saying.

So to start I'm going to show my true nerd side. A couple weeks ago I bought a tablet for myself. Nothing too fancy, just a nice little tablet to use for school work and stuff. Before I got the tablet, I did multiple tech reviews of the specs and different comparisons of tablets and how performance vs. price is among a wide range of tablets. While I was doing this you know what I realized? That damn near every tablet had the same technical specifications... Like from the iPad to the Galaxy Tab 3. Every got damn one had the same RAM, same differences in storage capacity, same pixels per inch, etc. The only major difference was the different company and maybe a slight change in UI, but that's it. So first off let me say don't fall for corporations cheap ass marketing schemes. If you buy a hoodie, it doesn't matter if it's Nike or Reebok the shit will keep you warm in the same weather and will fail to keep you warm at a certain point. Digress.

Anyways, as I was doing these technical researches I also stumbled upon some patents that Samsung and Apple are applying for (which are all freakin crazy and the future is going to be insane by like 2020 when all of this stuff begins to come out, digress) and as I read these patents I couldn't help to think about how quickly technology is advancing. I mean, does anyone truly comprehend that in our short lifetime we have seen the transition from AOL dial up being standard to everyone having data plans for cell phones? Don't even mention how our parents started out with computers that took up actual rooms and now they're trying to SnapChat us on their new iPhone! I digress, just know technology is fuckin cool.

Anyways, I began to think, as I do, about all of the revolutions and things that have happened in the world and thought about how the most significant ones were done with no technology at all. I mean even Paul Revere would've enjoyed sending a text instead of riding that horse, we've seen that Geico commercial. Then I just went on to think, well damn our grandparents generation stood up for what they believed in during the civil rights movement and they didn't have shit but house phones and postcards.

This lead me to think about our generation. All of the stupid shit that's actually going on and how we're just content with sitting to the side and watching everything that's being done to the actual majority by the fictional majority in Capitol Hill.

-I mean just look at the government shut down. You see when they speak about it they have to say "partial shutdown" because they know damn well federal prisons still lockin innocent people up, the army still over seas looking for new lands to invade, and all them dirty ass conniving politicians are still making their 6 figure salaries. Once again I digress. I will say that whole thing is about to come back up in January so please be ready for it.-

Anyways, I thought to myself, "What is it going to take to get people to wake up and see what's actually going on?" Then I just began to think about how easy it would be to actually make a change if people actually weren't so complacent and stood together.

The internet is a powerful thing man! Technology can mess some stuff up. Shit, even the Anonymous group of vigilantes does whatever they want and the FBI knows they can't even begin to put an end to that.

So then with all of this thinking, as I clearly put in the title of this post, I began to realize that right now is the perfect time. We're at a pivotal time in history that no other generation will see. We are at a point where the ways of the past are being proven wrong daily. All of these fake teachings that were concreted in America's system are being dispelled everyday.

"If you ever want to make good money and have a great job you have to go to college!" Wrong. Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerburg, Sean Parker all have a couple billion to shut that up.

"Hard work is the only way to make it in this country." Oh really? This is why my parents can work hours on end and I can get on CNN and see an article about #RichKidsonInstagram and how these millionaires children are spending $30,000 dollars at a bar with their friends? Have they ever had jobs? Doubt it. Will they inherit their parents money? NO QUESTIONS ABOUT IT.

I could go on and on, and I'm sure that everyone else has their own examples, but the point is this man. We are at a rift between the Industrial Age of the past and the Information Age, which will be followed by the Technology Age. Yet somehow we're still doing things the exact way they were before all of these technological advances, for the most part. (Google and Facebook and companies of the sort figured it out, but eveeryone else is a bit behind.)

So when is our generation actually going to take a stand? When are we going to gain our own voice and begin to ask questions and demand answers? Clearly this system in America is once again becoming outdated, but our generation is scared to take a stand because the person who goes against the grain is criticized. What is it going to take for people to realize that RIGHT NOW is the ideal time to have a social reform (not all out revolution, but that's not out of the question, though) especially among the black community. Power doesn't come through these fake ass legislators just going along with things because it's the way things have been done and it's working. CLEARLY IT'S NOT FUCKING WORKING! More and more people on poverty, major cities filing for bankruptcy, the nation keeps becoming weaker mentally but strengthening the military, etc. I mean foreal man...

All of this technology and knowledge is at our fingertips and the biggest concern on most peoples minds is trending topics on Twitter and how many likes they get on their Instagram pictures. How about we stop living for/through other people with this technology and start using it to better the world. After all, I'm not trying to be a part of the generation where people look back and think, damn what did they even  do in their lifetime?

All it takes is to get people moving in the right direction, the power is in numbers. And with the technology we have, it's easier now more than ever to spread word to the masses. YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Blogs, Radio, Television, Newspapers, Text Messages, Phone Calls, I mean got dammit we have everything that everyone's ever had in the past and more and we still won't do a damn thing...

All I'm saying is, we all see the problems that are going on in the neighborhoods, country, world and it is up to us to take a stand and fix things before it is too late. And if we don't think that now is the optimal time to do that, then when will we? Or will we ever?

Idk man, hopefully some of y'all feel me on this, but regardless leave some comments. I'm trying to see where other people stand.

As always, just my thoughts...

-Marcus J

What's the Hold Up?

For those who actually check my blog from time to time, you might be wondering why I haven't been posting recently.

Don't worry, I still have many thoughts that are more radical than the ones already posted, I just want them to be well thought up and developed before I post them so that I can say something that sticks in everyone's mind. Above that, I am doing more research on the topics I have been thinking about (autodidactism remember?) so this may take some time every now and again but please believe I have a lot more coming.

And what's coming well be nothing short of a prelude of what I believe will come in our lifetime.

Feel free to look through my older posts to prepare for the upcoming ones.

Always remember, these are just my thoughts.

-Marcus J.

Self-Reflection on Memory Lane...

Ok, so today I was deep in my thoughts -arguably my feelings too lol- but I was literally getting a headache from thinking about things that are happening right now and felt like I was going insane. The main thing I was thinking about is how many things are about to change in my life in a matter of months, and by many I mean damn near everything.

Seeing how it is my fourth year in college, a lot of my colleagues will be graduating but due to my work/class schedule I will not. This makes me think of life, and everything that comes with it. How crazy it is that in a matter of seconds, minutes, hours, any amount of time your whole life can change permanently. Like that's actually crazy to think about, but I digress whatever.

So where did my thoughts lead me? To pictures and videos and posts and things of that sort to every social media outlet I've had since I was in middle school. From MySpace to FaceBook and all of that shit. Looking through pictures, thinking about the story that correlates with every one and the people who were in my life during those periods.

The joys and triumphs at every period and the people that were there with me to celebrate them, and also the hard times that I faced and the people who were there for me in my darkest moments.

And you want to know what I thought about? Where are these people now? All of these beautiful souls that helped me to get to where I am today, where are they? Of all the people that are in these pictures and these posts, shit even my top friends on MySpace (throwback right? haha) but where are they?

Then on top of that I began to think... Damn, do we not talk any more because of them or because of me? All of these "friends" that I had, why haven't I heard from any of them? My number's been the same since I was a freshman in high-school so it can't be me right? Wrong...

So from these thoughts I went into a period of self-reflection. Reflecting on all of the good times, all the bad times, all the people I've judged, all the people I wouldn't open up to, all the people I saw as just in my life for a season so I refused to put an effort into making a lasting relationship.

**Side note: one of my biggest fears is that I will end up alone in my final hour. Which of course is the way the world works, you're born alone and you die alone right? But the one thing that I do not want to do is die by myself. I think it has something to do with me being put in an incubator when I was born, but nobody knows those effects, I'm not sure of any studies on that lol. Anyways yeah, definitely one of my biggest fears, digress.**

So while I'm going through these pictures and seeing all of these people who have had impacts on my life I just start to think, got dammit I'm the reason these people only talk to me once a year, when I actually decide to show myself at home. Whatever, the past is the past right?

This lead me to think, damn it'll probably be the same thing with people that I've met in college. I'll have a few people that I'm still cool with then the rest just face to face associates.

Then this lead me to thinking about careers, and life, and finally death. And somehow I came to the realization that I am the reason that I will have to be in the situation that I am most scared of... whatever digress.

So after this I started thinking about people from my past, and how I've helped them out (at least I would like to think so). Of all these people, do I still talk to them? Do they still need people to talk to? and so on and so forth.

I guess this rant end with a pretty obvious claim and a challenge. People die everyday and no matter what the age is, it always seems unexpected or too soon. These people that you've had stories with, laughed with, cried with, they're not promised a certain amount of time on this earth man. And the shittiest feeling in the world is if that person passes away and the only thing you can say is, it's been so long since I've talked to them, or Damn, we used to be so close.

So my challenge to anyone, Idk if people even read these shits but whatever, is to reach out to a couple of these people everyday in your spare time. See if they're ok. See if they're accomplishing their goals and dreams. At the very least, pray for protection and energy for them. Because you don't want to be that person at the end of your life wondering who cares that your time is coming to an end, or if you made an impact on people's lives.

You can't change the past, but you can reflect on it and use it to change your future. Learn from the lessons that you teach yourself during self-reflection. You're the only person that truly knows what you need to do in the end.

Whatever, my thoughts.

-Marcus J.